Coping with the loss of a loved one is difficult, and everyone deals with it in his or her own way. While there is no right or wrong way to grieve, there are some common misconceptions about how to deal with grief. For example, ignoring the pain of a loss does not make it go away faster, and one should not feel the need to “be strong.” In turn, if someone does not cry that does not mean that individual is not in pain or does not feel sorry for the loss.

Most people do, however, experience these five stages of grief:
•    denial
•    anger
•    bargaining
•    depression
•    acceptance

Regardless of one’s grieving style, it is important to get support and make taking care of one’s health a priority after a loss. It is common for people to experience shock and disbelief, extreme sadness and guilt or anger. The loss of a loved one often also brings about fear – of one’s own mortality, of the future or of new responsibilities. In addition, physical symptoms such as insomnia, aches and pains, weight gain or weight loss and nausea can also manifest.

There is no timetable for grief, but often people hold on to their grief because they feel guilty for moving on. Death is a natural part of life, and moving forward does not erase that person’s memory nor will it take away from how much they are missed.

The Oak Park Arms is a rental retirement community which provides independent and assisted living apartments and a full schedule of activities and services. Furnished apartments are also available for a short-term stay – a weekend, a week, a month or longer.

The program is free and open to the public. For more information call 708-386-4040.